I AM SO BACK FROM THE ROYAL CARIBBEAN :D
it was okay...didnt shop much..
ATE ALOT
i gained one and a half kg :C
it should be gone soon i hope..

i am so sun burned...
actually im not upset about it...
i am FINALLY tanned :D
thats one thing i loved
im debating if i should post up a pic
of my bod but im afraid it will be porn..
HAHAHAHA

the other awesome thing
was the really cute
TURKEY waiter
that served me dinner every night..
i think his like 28 ??

Oh man! i really wished i could keep him..
i love his smile and his eyes and his hair
and his accent and his mannners and
EVERYTHING!
~will post up a pic of him soon

I think there something that attracts me
to like western/european guy
their just yeah...really appealing..
i wanna MARRY one..
HAHAHA funny

Actually i told myself when i was really
young that when i grow up i will marry
an european guy..so that i can carry on mixing
my already mixed heritage...which i myself
am unclear of...HAHA...but i love it..
its like in a way a family tradition?


2009 is in like in approximately 3 hours and 40 minutes
my new year resolutions are:
1.To serve my God wholeheartedly
2.Be independent

Thats all...whee...got to pop off to church soon...perhaps i will dance tonight...kinda happy and excited although hollow thoughts and hopeless
dreams are stirring on the inside...nonetheless..im happy (ALL SMILES)


~See you tonight Love!

7:11 PM
Bridget

Today post has nothing to do with u :p
EAT THAT!
Went Bugis and Haji lane today...
i guess i needed some retail therapy..
to calm myself down...
So i bought!
3 pairs of earrings
1 summer dress ( for christmas day,will be bringing it on cruise too)
1 bikini (its red checks and my thighs look huge)

Yeah thats all...

~i dont have the heart to love you.. ( my foot!kick you la!bleagh!!!)

9:56 PM
Bridget

I dont have the heart - James Ingram

This song just starts another waterfall...probably the 3rd song that ever did thats non-christian base. :) I guess i just dont have the heart.

1:03 AM
Bridget

11th December 2008
THE END
when everything comes to an end..
the cat gets out of the bag..
and the dirty linen is shone out in the open..
i just really wished there was a fairy tale ending..

maybe im too old for fairytales..
yet again too immature
Go to sleep kim
its late
im alone again

~the tears stopped falling

2:50 AM
Bridget

I hate staying at home with nothing to do...i prefer a busy life style...while there are things that i could do at home like helping out in the office or packing my very abstractly organised room..i prefer staring straight at my lap top typing aimlessly while engaged in a fierce battle of who can kill the most ants (ITS THE BEST GAME Tonight, will be going for Kids/ Youth camp thank you dinner...going to be a lonely night...hate that your just leaving because you no longer feel that there a reason for you to be here...cant believe your just going to leave me stranded with no one else to joke with...selfish idiot...although i do understand why its like that...

i really wonder why everything is so terribly messed up...were in a church...a catholic church...where catholic means universal and were suppose to accept one another for who they are and grow as a community and depend on one another..Instead were hurting one another by being selfish...destroying friendships and trying to outdo each other...i hate this...

And when life this complicated...i take sweet comfort in the fact that your still silently seated right next to me...living the simple life..happy that your both here with me.

1:03 PM
Bridget

I admit it...i have been covering up my life again....trying to pretend that the things that are really affecting me dont exist...i guess its because..im afraid...of letting people know who i really am....an emotional nut case who is extremely clingy but pretends that she alright when you dont call.. i would really like for u to call me everyday...

but i dont want you to call me if you dont want to entertain me at the same time...Also i dont want you to worry about me being stupid when actually im okay but just being paranoid...sigh...i really miss the past where you were always there to put a smile on my face ( you still do) or when u are able to tell when im upset..

i guess i just really miss your attention and having you around...right now when i get to meet you or hear your voice...its already something really important to me...kinda dumb...judging that its not the same for you...for you your just talking to kim again...

~i miss the past...

funny isnt it....you want something you dont have and when you get it...you want back what you previously had...but actually in the end its the samething...i just want you.

11:39 AM
Bridget

one,two,three, four


9:38 PM
Bridget

Youth camp is OVER! pity...i had lots of fun...but i was really tired...Right now im currently looking forward to finding a job ( i want $$$$) and getting ready for the event on the 20th...i bought my dress...its green with floral prints and its really long...i need to get it altered cause im so tiny and i intend to get silver pretty ribbons in my hair..was also deciding if i should wear my ugly gladiators (as bud calls them) or buy wedges...I LOVE DRESSING UP...

I was also thinking...maybe im ready to go public with my blog...but than again my personal insecurities just flooded back and prevented me from doing so...I lead a private life...no one knows wads gg on in every part of my life...its cool to live ur life in secrecy...but sometimes it hurts...because having to pretend makes me feel like im suffocating..Its like im hiding my true self from others...but i know its for a good cause...but i hate seeing what is mine being shared..yet again they dont know and sharing good...im possessive...HAHAHAHA

sometimes i feel like i belong to the community but actually in truth im not accepted...acceptance we all long for it..

~my secret life

1:33 PM
Bridget